By: Jeff Doke

TheSouthernSportsEdition.com news services

Over the last year, COVID has caused some pretty significant sports cancellations – March Madness, the Olympics, UGA vs. the North Avenue Trade School Alumni Slush Fund Referees.

For me, the most significant cancellation was the Savannah Hockey Classic.

I was more than a little disappointed when the 2021 tournament was cancelled, but that just made me that much more happy when the news broke of the East Coast Hockey League coming to the Coastal Empire.

The ECHL, one of two official mid-level minor leagues of the NHL, has teams that include the Jacksonville Icemen, the South Carolina Stingrays, and the Atlanta Gladiators.

The new franchise in Savannah, scheduled to start play in 2022, is yet to be named.

You can follow the developments ramping up to the puck drop (including a name-the-franchise contest) at savannahprohockey.com.

In the meantime, here’s a few suggestions I’d like to put forth.

Savannah Banana Spiders – okay, full disclosure; I am NOT a fan of the Savannah Bananas.

Now, don’t get me wrong; I love minor league baseball. I had season tickets to the Sand Gnats. Call me a codger, but dagnabbit, baseball isn’t supposed to be goofy! And the Bananas have goofiness in spades.

Never mind the fact that bananas don’t grow in Savannah…but banana spiders do. Not sure how our arachnophobic fans will react, but at least it’s an ecologically accurate franchise name.

Savannah Banana Hammocks – Okay, picture this; Borat in his swimsuit as celebrity spokesman…on second thought, don’t. Nevermind. Moving on…

Savannah Hunters – This one tips the hat to both the Army presence in Savannah (Hunter Army Airfield), as well as the rapidly dwindling “good ol’ boy” demographic in the Low Country.

You saw which counties were blue vs. red back in November. Tell me I’m wrong. The only question is whether or not the “bro country, lifetime NRA membership, RealTree camo” demographic will go for hockey. Now, before you get your Salt Life t-shirt all wrinkled, chill out. I’m in every one of those categories, too.

Savannah Midnight – it’s been almost thirty years since “Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil” put Savannah back in the national consciousness for the first time since Sherman’s march, and it still draws some serious tourist dollars.

Just imagine the cross promotions with Club One! We’d run the risk of alienating the previously mentioned demographic, but from what I understand, every list of potential franchise names is required to have a non-plural noun (Magic, Wild, Kraken, et. al.). I think it’s a law. Maybe just an executive order. I’ve lost track.

Savannah Shamrocks – This one was my favorite until I remembered that there’s already a squad going by that moniker.

The Savannah contingent of USA Rugby as a matter of fact, and I’d rather not be the one to approach those guys about co-ownership of the name.

I know some of those guys. Some of them are teddy bears, some are wildebeests, and it’s impossible to tell the difference until it’s too late. My HMO recommends we pass on this one as well.

Savannah Spirits – Here’s another sneaky one. Do we mean Spirits as in the ghostly beings that fuel the numerous haunted tours downtown, or Spirits as in the liquid courage that fuels the numerous questionable life choices downtown?

I guess we’ll have to wait to see the mascot to decide. (Bonus points if you remember the short-lived CBA franchise of the same name!)

Chatham Artillery – This one is my absolute favorite. It references an old school Savannah recipe known as Chatham Artillery Punch.

When the recipe calls for three *bottles* of liquor and three *bottles* of champagne mixed in a bucket, you know this is a beverage that DOES NOT FOOL AROUND. And it’s one that screams “Savannah.”

Remember the quote from “the book” as it is known to the locals; “If you go to Atlanta, the first question people ask you is, ‘What’s your business?’ In Macon they ask, ‘Where do you go to church?’… But in Savannah the first question people ask you is ‘What would you like to drink?’”

Hopefully soon, the second question will be “wanna go watch some hockey?”