By: Charlie Moon

TheSouthernSportsEdition.com news services

Gimme two chains and a big ole pimp hat – a big green one with a thick black stripe around the brim. Sounds like a garb-laden recipe for great football. I get it. We’re in a new era of youth sports. Bat-flipping and TD chains are a way of pigskin normalcy. But the Canes are king when it comes to all swag, no substance.

I really try not to be Mr. Hyperbole, but I think the Canes might be the most disappointing college football team of the last twenty years.

Consider this. From 1983 to 2003, the Hurricanes won more than 10 games, 14 times. All 5 of the Canes’ national titles were won during that same time span.

And since then?…..just one 10-plus win season.

Seeing that, I nearly spit out my iced coffee.

Their schedule slots several slippery slopes.

The Canes get ACC favorite FSU at home and don’t even have to play the #2 squad Clemson Tigers. Those playoff chances hinge heavily on the Canes opening week trip to Gainesville. They also have roadies at Cal and GA Tech.

Word around Coral Gables is the U will get back to its natural born identity, the run game. Last year, Miami ranked 10th in average yards/carry of Power 5 teams. Sweet, but the Canes want to add more sugar.

The Georgia Bulldogs have been known as “Running Back U” for a couple decades, but before that Miami was right there. Coral Gables was hot-n-heavy with studs like Alonzo Highsmith, Willis McGahee and Edgerrin James.

For all the flamboyant flamingo flying of guys like Michael Irvin and Bennie Blades, it was the rushing game that sweetened the Canes.

There’s probably more upside to the Miami RB room than any other ACC squad. 2023 leading rusher Henry Parrish left for Lane Kiffin’s Rebels, but the Canes got what I think will be one of the top ACC transfers in Oregon State’s Junior Damian Martinez.

In his first two years, he tallied 2,167 yds and 6.4 yards/carry. AJ Allen and Mark Fletcher add depth and both would probably start for many Top 20 teams.

The O-line returns most of its bulk but will be led by Indiana transfer center and 2023 All Big 10er, Zach Rivers.

Leading wideout Xavier Restepo brings back his 85 catches. The rest of the wideout room is good, but not great.

But the biggest reason Canes Nation sees sunshine is QB transfer Cam Ward from Washington State.

Most of the country may have rarely, if ever, seen Ward play. Let’s face it. If it wasn’t for Phil Knight’s checkbook, the only thing college football fans would respect out of the northwest would be the occasional bark of the Huskies, certainly not the Cougars.

But I believe Cam Ward will be THE #1 most valuable ACC transfer and a sleeper for the country’s top role. He’s got it all with his legs and his arm. Once he improved his progression reading, he became lethal. The 3-year Apple State man has thrown for over 11,500 yards with 92 TDs and 25 INTs.

Honestly, I don’t even know where to start with the Canes defense. We’re in the age of the transfer portal. But, the Canes have a possible 12 transfer starters, it would be like predicting how many flamingos will be in the next Miami Vice flick.

The biggest wildcard for Miami is HC Mario “Can’t Get Right” Christobal. I’m sure he’s a smart guy. You don’t reach that level without being smart.

But that doesn’t mean your brain won’t freeze when the lights come on. With a 3-point lead against GA Tech last year, who had no time outs, what do you do?

Obviously, you run the ball, right? Wrong! They ran it…and fumbled. GA Tech scored a few plays later. It could be forgotten, but Christobal did something similar when he was at Oregon.

In the end, I really think this is finally the year that the Canes get back to national prominence. Not saying they’re a sneaky top 4 or 5 team, but I do think they’re a sneaky shot to reach the expanded playoff.

Much weighs on Cam Ward. I think he’s a Heisman dark horse Top 5. Damian Martinez is a dark horse Doak Walker winner. It’ll come down to the defensive transfers and a coach who has a history of going brain dead.